Living Life with Cancer

I stumbled upon my blog again because of a Facebook memory. It has been very cathartic re-reading my posts about my journey at the beginning. I am now six years in and I can say I forgot about many of those feelings. I guess it's a lot like child birth, we forget the pain, but remember the joy. And yes there has been joy.
I started this blog 6 years ago to give me an avenue to vent....to share my story. I was good about sharing and then there became not us much to share.....until the last couple of weeks.

On March 19th I went in for my routine CT scan. No big deal. I have had many over the years. It has all become routine. Well, this one had different results. For the first time in almost 6 years,  I did not get a positive result. I have a new 1.5 cm mass that had formed. Why? We don't know. There is so much you can speculate on. So many questions that can circle in my head. Should I have stopped the other medication? Is that why it is back? Should I have done this? That? Why didnt I do this??? Then you tell yourself to STOP! It is what it is. I can't go back and change anything. Everything that was done in my treatment was done because it was right for that moment.

I think deep down I knew that this could come back at some point. I was stage 4, 6 years ago. I killed that cancer. I have already beat so many odds. And now I will again!

Last week, I had a biopsy done and it was confirmed that it is the same cancer. Invasive ductal carcinoma. Further tests will be done to determine what other "markers" there are.  It appears to be only growing in the breast. Near where the original mass was. That is all the CT scan showed. However, next week I will do the routine of 6 years ago....another PET scan to see if it us hiding in lymphnodes around my body. Possible MRI. More biopsies? But PET scan will really drive my treatment. I will meet with "my" cancer team next Thursday, April 12th to know which way we are going.

Through all of this I am "ok." I have nothing but hope that things will be ok. I have so much to fight for. My family! My kids! My job that I love! Life!  How long that will the fight be? I don't know. I have been doing this for 6 years, what's a few more.

As always, please send lots of prayers for healing and prayers for my family. The kids are older now. They understand a lot more.

Thank you my tribe! ♥♥♥


Isaiah 41:10   "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."